In my SFO formation materials for next month (Catch Me a Rainbow Too
“When you become aware of other thoughts intruding, return gently to your sacred word. Thoughts are a normal part of centering prayer.”
This is a nice echo of the idea in the last post that distracting thoughts are normal, and that the proper course of action when they arise is to acknowledge them, and then to let them fade away on their own as you re-establish the focus of your prayer, be it your breathing, a sacred word, a couple words from a section of scripture, or anything else.
It is becoming clearer to me as I dwell on these ideas that there is a real demarcation between “Who I Am” and the thoughts that I have.
If I am consciously aware of this distinction, as I pray, and as I live, then I can begin to actually achieve the suggestion presented by Phil Jackson in the Who Am I? post:
“The point of Zen practice is to make you aware of the thoughts that run your life and diminish their power over you.”
If I am present in the given moment, especially present to God in that moment, than I can see the thoughts separately from my core being, and if I can see them separately, I can begin to control them instead of having them control me.
The thoughts that I have are a part of “Who I Am”, but they are not the total of “Who I Am”. The distinctive part that is separate may have many different labels, but I think for the moment I will define this as Will.
My Will, therefore, is separate and distinct from my thoughts.
But I cannot use my Will to control my thoughts, and the actions that come from those thoughts, unless I am aware enough of the current moment to actually choose to exercise it.
So, for instance, if I am leaving the driveway on my way to work, and desolation creeps over me, there are two possible results.
If I am unaware, the desolation will dominate me, and it will control the course of my day.
But if I am aware in the moment, if I am able to bring my Will to bear, then I can control the situation, and I can change the outcome of the initial thought.
I can use my Will to exert and accept the presence of God to me in that moment. I can acknowledge the Love that I know He is offering me in place of the desolation.
If I know He is present, and if I know He loves me, how can the feelings of desolation ever prevail?
This is very true! I am very much a believer in the fact that we are, to a very large extent, responsible for how we feel. Instead of trying to rely on anti-depressants (which seem to be given out like candy, at times) we need to ground ourselves in what Tim has stated in the his last sentence: “If I know He is present, and if I know He loves me, how can the feelings of desolation ever prevail?” This doesn’t mean that we won’t ever be alone physically, but it does mean, I think, that we are always in God’s presence; we are also surrounded by “a great cloud of witnesses.” For me – at perhaps for others – I also need to remember that “feelings” are transitory and can be deceptive. My faith is not based on the warm fuzzies, but rather the fact that God is with me.
Thank you, Tim, for stating all these things so eloquently!